.Be kind, that's all.

The time that is, and my first blog not written during the twilight zone for a good few weeks.

Taken from the fabulous book the boy the mole the fox and the horse.

Won’t name it yet I’ll just write and see what pops up in my mind this evening, in fact I’m going to grab a cup of caffeine free tea and do this live from the garden.

Won’t be a minute …⌚⏳

Well it’s now 20.05 , got me tea. I like this one definitely ranks high on my list of tea types.

Me mum just called so I had a little chat about stuff, you know the weather and the weather. I know she’s worried sick so I kind of don’t tell her everything, she doesn’t need to have the extra worry, mum’s don’t need that at their age. I think mum’s never really stop worrying about their children, dad’s are the same but really they kind of pretend they don’t. But being a dad I know the truth.❤️

So today I had another visit to the docs, this time for an injection for a hormone implant, to says it’s a big needle is like saying a blue whale is a fish, in fact I took a picture of it. 

It goes in the tummy and takes about 5 minutes to administer it, the nurse was pretty good although she didn’t do much for my faith in her when she said I’ve never done one of these before. She assured me she had looked it up on the internet , ok nothing to worry about, only a  hormone injection virgin, what could possibly go wrong.😓🛌

To be fair I gave her an 8 out of 10 not bad for a vigin wikipedia student, to which she was grateful. I thought after perhaps I should of given her a 9 especially as she’s booked me in for the next one in 4 weeks time. 😀

It’s not too cold sitting in the garden tonight, clouds are racing each other across the sky tonight 

Not too bad considering it’s very dark 

I thought I would experiment with the settings 

I’ve been thinking about just how easy it is to get down and go into the dark parts of the mind.

When you are on lots of combinations of drugs it can affect other things. So today we found out that basically I’m running very high on my blood pressure, I mean seriously high. You feel like, oh here we go again, they are now investigating possible type 2 diabetes so I’m on another tablet and back to the docs for regular blood pressure checks and blood tests.

I can see how people give up. It’s one thing after another, my resting heart is normally around 70 now it’s over 100. I need to have a little chat with my heart later ❤️ 

I have to just remain positive otherwise it’s all for nothing. So I make jokes about everything, I find things to inspire and lift me, I smile a lot and when I laugh I’m like a smaller version of Brian Blessed, I listen to music that has great lyrics and top muscicians. Today was Super Tramps Breakfast in America. 

Anyway I digress, it would be easy now to start going down the negative path, but you just can’t, do that, you’ve got to hang in there and ride the storm, no storm lasts forever.

Anyone reading this don’t be tempted to turn to the dark side I’ve been there for some years and it ain’t nice, your experience of what you are going through is not caused by the things that are done to you, if you keep on blaming everything on what’s done to you it will become difficult to lose that mind set.

Take the injection today as an example. I didn’t really feel a lot because I had already told myself it won’t hurt , now it did a little , but imagine if I told myself this is going to hurt like hell I hate this needle that is all about the needle , I told myself the needle was my friend and once a month it was going to help me out. Surprisingly there was very little pain. I believe that is my placebo affect in action and maybe a small part of the universe🙏

For anyone reading this you must stay in the present moment.

The past and the future have a completly different nervous system 

The present moment is the only thing you can control ❤️

The present moment is when I’m in a state of mind where I chose how I want to be, the past has great memories, I can chose to revisit those memories when ever I want, if you have bad memories from the past you can chose to visit those tioo, but what good is that going to do. And yet may people chose to do just that, the problem is you can’t change bad memories they just sit there and weigh you down. 

The future is unknown, I visualise the future, but I know I have no control over it, neither does anyone else on this planet. No matter how rich or poor the future is unknown and to be honest I like to keep it that way.

The present is when you spend time with the ones you love, you live your life in the present and make it the best it can be, dont have one eye on your mobile, whilst your with the kids, devote your full attention to them, you will be glad you did.

If you feel it’s really difficult right now go out today and just perform a couple of random acts of kindness to someone, then tell me, that it didnt make you feel just a little bit better, that’s living in the NOW. Do it again tomorrow and the next day, be kind to everyone you meet, keep kind thoughts in your mind, and you will start to move away from the dark side.❤️